This advertisement appeared in our local paper yesterday. It just cracks me up every time I read it. It’s worded exactly the wrong way and I love that. If it had said “Dr. Crouch, urologist, announces his association…” it wouldn’t have been funny at all.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
There’s a $60-per-month diet pill being advertised online, the ingredient label for which reads: Active ingredient: 1,3,7-trimethylxanthine 100mg (pharmaceutical grade) Those who aren’t organic chemistry hobbyists, please follow the link above for an explanation. The best part is the one review website I found that’s full of statements from satisfied customers like “special weight loss [...]
Thursday, December 18, 2008
*Title courtesy of Butt Trumpet* For those who are not in the know, every year Michael and I send a package to his relatives in the middle of the country. Last year we went to FedEx in person and they handled everything well, and our package, even though we shipped it late, even got there [...]
If you’ve been paying attention, everyone is writing about how that one Wal-Mart employee getting trampled means the Holidays are too consumerist and OH GOD WE’VE LOST OUR WAY IN THE MIDST OF ALL THIS KEEPING UP WITH THE JONESESESESESES! Here was my first thought: gee, maybe now Wal-Mart and everyone else will stop with [...]
Friday, September 12, 2008
I read this earlier this week and felt the immediate need to take produce a tidal-wave of vomit, one that would wipe out every single person on the planet who thinks and feels the same way as the woman in charge of this chat. It’s times like these I am grateful for Michael because we [...]
Last night, as Michael and I are strolling through a mostly-closed mall towards our car, I note the long line of people (nerds, young professionals) waiting outside an Apple store. I ask Michael why people are lined up, “are they giving out free blow jobs at the Apple store?” Nope, he tells me. They’re lined [...]
I’m in the process of looking up ideas and brainstorming about cheap and interesting centerpieces for my youngest sister’s graduation party. I like these idle things. Here’s what I absolutely, positively, can not stand: People who recommend using fish as centerpieces. Here’s a newsflash, Martha Stewart wannabes: Fish are living creatures. A fish in a [...]
I’ve taken the liberty of removing the depressing parts of today’s news, so that you, the reader, may enjoy it without requiring prescription medication. Enjoy! Oil prices [...] $8 on economic [...] By ADAM SCHRECK, AP Business Writer NEW YORK – Oil prices [...] Tuesday as [...] about the nation’s [...] moved to the fore [...]
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Anyone who is pro-ana. Walk away right now, because I know you’re just going to throw a fit about how no one understands you and how you have every right to do what you want to your own body. You’re right, you do. But don’t think for a minute that the way you take care [...]
Folks, I’m a big believer in individual rights. I think if you have the resources to start a business, you should be allowed to. But I think a pro-life drugstore is a dangerous machination intended to prevent women from taking care of themselves. Let me tell you why. I’ve mentioned before that women are often [...]