Archive for the 'Rants' Category

Jan 28 2009

PETA Sucks Asparagus

Published by Kara under Health, Rants

PETA really loves vegetables.
If that’s how PETA feels about vegetables and they love animals too, I’m waiting for the bestiality ad.
Is this ad aimed at men or women? Women are a lot more likely to become vegetarian, but men are a lot more likely to find the transference of a woman licking asparagus enticing. Also, [...]

6 responses so far

Jan 19 2009

Oh, How I Hate Starbucks

Published by Michael under Rants

I bought an espresso at Starbucks at Union Station on my way home the other day. I walked in and asked for a “double espresso.” I even said “please”, as I recall.
“A doppio,” the woman at the counter responded.
Let me clarify at this point, lest I seem totally insane to the reader, that she was [...]

3 responses so far

Jan 15 2009

This Makes Me Angrier than Expected

Published by Michael under Rants

Every day now, there’s some news story about the economy in which some aspect of the current crisis exceeds analysts’ expectations. Yesterday it was “Consumer spending plummets twice as much as expected”; today it’s “Jobless claims up more than expected.” Have you noticed this?
This has been going on for months now, and it occurs to [...]

One response so far

Jan 13 2009

Memo to an Anonymous Co-worker

Published by Michael under Rants

Vocabulary is not a weapon to be deployed against those you consider inferior. Especially when you aren’t very good at it.
I congratulate you on your understanding of the difference between “between” and “among”, but “betwixt” is not a fancier way to say “among.” I thought you were just being funny the first time.
“Allude” is not [...]

No responses yet

Dec 18 2008

Mail Boxes Etc Can Eat the Corn Out of my Shit

Published by Kara under Rants, Sad

*Title courtesy of Butt Trumpet*
For those who are not in the know, every year Michael and I send a package to his relatives in the middle of the country. Last year we went to FedEx in person and they handled everything well, and our package, even though we shipped it late, even got there [...]

6 responses so far

Dec 18 2008

Fat People Are Too Damn Sensitive

Published by Kara under Rants, Whining

Yo fatties, I’m saying this as a fat chick – take a chill pill.
I read this complaint on consumerist and I laughed and laughed. Especially at the part where she said the clerk called her fat and poor. Because if I had that discussion with a clerk, I’d do one of a few things:

Ask the [...]

5 responses so far

Dec 07 2008

Consumerism Isn’t the Real Problem

Published by Kara under Rants, Sad

If you’ve been paying attention, everyone is writing about how that one Wal-Mart employee getting trampled means the Holidays are too consumerist and OH GOD WE’VE LOST OUR WAY IN THE MIDST OF ALL THIS KEEPING UP WITH THE JONESESESESESES!
Here was my first thought: gee, maybe now Wal-Mart and everyone else will stop with the [...]

6 responses so far

Dec 05 2008

I’m Aversa to Your Writing, Jeannine

Published by Michael under Rants

Today’s AP wire carries a hard-hitting story on the economic crisis by one Jeannine Aversa. I am about to explain why this article pisses me off, but let me preface this rant by saying that I have no personal quarrel with Ms. Aversa. Except with regard to her writing, which as I previously mentioned pisses [...]

No responses yet

Nov 05 2008

A Sad Irony

Published by Kara under Politics, Rants

The moment that people are applauding as evidence that America can overcome prejudice is also the night that many states voted not to extend equal marriage rights to gay couples.
I’m not sure if that constitutes irony, as it’s been awhile since I’ve brushed up on my literary terms. But what I can say is this:
We [...]

No responses yet

Oct 20 2008

I Hate Earth Shoes, I Heart Zappos

Published by Michael under Plugs, Rants

Well, I officially heart Zappos.com.
Kara and I have raved about the comfort of the Earth shoes that we’ve now both bought. The negative heel construction is an amazing thing. Unfortunately, their quality of construction is poor, as I found out today.
The right shoe of my four-month-old pair has developed a crack that goes all the [...]

No responses yet

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