Comments on: Obesity and Beauty http://blog.4d2.org/2008/04/16/obesity-and-beauty/ Because everyone else already has one Wed, 01 Feb 2012 02:58:07 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Michael http://blog.4d2.org/2008/04/16/obesity-and-beauty/comment-page-1/#comment-300 Michael Thu, 17 Apr 2008 12:39:13 +0000 http://blog.4d2.org/?p=277#comment-300 Most likely. I think it's perfectly natural for people to strive for beauty in themselves. I just think there's maybe a disconnect between that and what other people want -- the first is this uniform, collective idea, and the second is anything but. When I mentioned people who buy into beauty, I was talking about people on the observer end of the equation, thinking of men I have known, maybe one in ten, who honestly believe that cookie-cutter beautiful people are the most appealing. These are the guys whose personal "ratings" of women would correspond perfectly with hotornot.com -- in other words, the completely average. (I'm sure this works the other way round as well, it's just that most of my friends have been male.) There will always be people who have "average" opinions for whatever reason, but just because they represent the average doesn't mean they're 50% of the population. There's nothing wrong with trying to make yourself more attractive to "most people", and most of us do so even when we're not trying to pick people up. I bother to groom myself most mornings, and not just because I'd eventually get fired for looking like a bum. The problem is that "attractive to most people" is a really nebulous target: useful as a goal up to a certain point, and almost certainly destructive beyond it. Society telling women that they had all better be as beautiful/attractive/hot/whatever as possible certainly doesn't help. Sorry, I'm ranting, and I answered your question three paragraphs ago. Most likely. I think it’s perfectly natural for people to strive for beauty in themselves. I just think there’s maybe a disconnect between that and what other people want — the first is this uniform, collective idea, and the second is anything but.

When I mentioned people who buy into beauty, I was talking about people on the observer end of the equation, thinking of men I have known, maybe one in ten, who honestly believe that cookie-cutter beautiful people are the most appealing. These are the guys whose personal “ratings” of women would correspond perfectly with hotornot.com — in other words, the completely average. (I’m sure this works the other way round as well, it’s just that most of my friends have been male.) There will always be people who have “average” opinions for whatever reason, but just because they represent the average doesn’t mean they’re 50% of the population.

There’s nothing wrong with trying to make yourself more attractive to “most people”, and most of us do so even when we’re not trying to pick people up. I bother to groom myself most mornings, and not just because I’d eventually get fired for looking like a bum. The problem is that “attractive to most people” is a really nebulous target: useful as a goal up to a certain point, and almost certainly destructive beyond it. Society telling women that they had all better be as beautiful/attractive/hot/whatever as possible certainly doesn’t help.

Sorry, I’m ranting, and I answered your question three paragraphs ago.

]]> By: jess http://blog.4d2.org/2008/04/16/obesity-and-beauty/comment-page-1/#comment-299 jess Thu, 17 Apr 2008 01:36:43 +0000 http://blog.4d2.org/?p=277#comment-299 is it beauty that people are striving for? is it beauty that people are striving for?

]]> By: Michael http://blog.4d2.org/2008/04/16/obesity-and-beauty/comment-page-1/#comment-298 Michael Wed, 16 Apr 2008 23:34:05 +0000 http://blog.4d2.org/?p=277#comment-298 I think your high school crush was right, too, and I think it says something about what exactly "beauty" means. It's a collective ideal, one that women and men are programmed to pursue instinctively (and stress over in ourselves), and yet I've never met a single person who didn't have their own preferences that differed from the standard collective idea of beauty. I think of beauty as a point where all of those preferences converge, and I think of people who really buy into beauty as a bit foolish. I think your high school crush was right, too, and I think it says something about what exactly “beauty” means. It’s a collective ideal, one that women and men are programmed to pursue instinctively (and stress over in ourselves), and yet I’ve never met a single person who didn’t have their own preferences that differed from the standard collective idea of beauty.

I think of beauty as a point where all of those preferences converge, and I think of people who really buy into beauty as a bit foolish.

]]> By: jess http://blog.4d2.org/2008/04/16/obesity-and-beauty/comment-page-1/#comment-297 jess Wed, 16 Apr 2008 21:02:15 +0000 http://blog.4d2.org/?p=277#comment-297 ha, you were always called the "beautiful" one of us. ha, you were always called the “beautiful” one of us.

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